On the spur of the moment, I was offered a “walk-on with line” part in a production of “The Producers” by Mel Brooks which played our Grand 1894 Opera House Saturday 1 March. I accepted with glee and had a wonderful time. Celia Davis, Steve Salch and Avis Patrick also had cameos. Steve and Avis were Saturday night and Celia and I were the Saturday matinee’ “stars.” Maureen Patton, the Executive Director of the Grand saw to it that we were treated as though we were semi-National Treasures. We were seated in a box near the stage door and provided with a bottle of very good champagne (which we did not touch until after our appearances).We were told to report at 2:00 P. M. for our instructions. The matinee’ began at 3:00 P. M. We were able to sit comfortably in our box until we were needed at the beginning of Act II and were escorted backstage at that time. After our appearances, we were escorted back to our box to view the rest of the hilarious comedy. We then made short work of the champagne. Celia had brought Phyllis “Tudy” Fundling as her guest but mine could not come at the last minute so Tudy held the fort for us when we went onstage and saw to it that no one swiped the bubbly from our box.
At 2:00 P. M. we met the Stage Manager, Suzanne Apicella, whose photo you will see between me and Celia in the snaps of this essay. She is a delightful and extremely talented young lady but also unfailingly polite as were all members of the cast and crew. It was a genuine pleasure to be with all of them and I only wish the experience could have lasted longer. Let me detail my part in this in view of the things I’ve had to say in the earlier parts of this essay.
Suzanne took me through the marks and moves backstage. She reassured me that there would be someone with me at all times to see that I was comfortable and that I did not trip over any of the miles of cable and wiring backstage. We rehearsed my line (like any good director, she did not tell me how to say it) and we went through where I would stand before I appeared and where I would be when appearing. That was followed by my directions to go downstage left and exit the scene.
As the foreman of a jury reporting to a judge my line was “We find the defendant incredibly guilty.” I won’t go into what makes this funny but be sure and see the show if you ever have a chance. (Both the matinee’ and the evening performance at the Grand were SRO---for you novices that’s Standing Room Only).
When I went backstage prior to appearing I stood by Suzanne who was at an amazing set of controls and videos which showed what was happening onstage, backstage, in the wings, etc. While giving cues to everyone concerned, Suzanne still managed to chat with me, asking if I was feeling fine and introducing me to the young man who would “mike” me. After that, the lead in the show, Jason Simon, whom I was going to find “incredibly guilty” stopped by to introduce himself and say “I hear you’re going to put me away.” I allowed as how that was what I had been told to do. Matthew Wade, the Judge, came up, introduced himself and took me by the hand to lead me to my mark behind scenes. He asked if I would say my line and I did. He found it to be just right. Then Matthew said “The tricky part to this is that when you finish your line there will be nothing else going on and you have to exit the stage---are you comfortable with that?” I said I could do it.
I said my line, with a group of “little old ladies” hissing me from the sidelines and moved downstage left to exit. I passed Jason who said, audibly, “Thanks, Vic” in a very sarcastic tone of voice and that made the day for me.
A few words about after the show should be added as I was able to somewhat repay the company for its kindness and thoughtfulness to me. No one knew that I had been doing theater for over fifty years and that there would be nothing about the experience to throw a curve at me. They very properly treated me as nice old man who might never have been on a stage before and I thought it was wonderful. No smart remarks, no jargon----just simple, old-fashioned good manners and kindness.
Now then, for after the show. I managed to find Jason Simon, the lead. These young men and women had about an hour and a half between very demanding performances and were being fed by Saltwater Grill so they could sustain the pace.
I told Jason that I had known Zero Mostel and had seen him in the first movie of “The Producers.” I also told him that I had seen Mr. Mostel open “Fiddler on the Roof” at the National Theater in Washington, D. C. What I wanted Jason to hear was that while Mr. Mostel was an extremely talented performer, he had grown somewhat stuck on himself through the years. This is not uncommon with people who become stars. I told Jason that I thought he was every bit as good as Mr. Mostel in the title role but better in another way. The point I wanted to make was that while Jason Simon was a splendid performer he had not lost the nice touch of concern for others and good manners. I told him I hoped he would be increasingly successful in his acting career but that he would retain his even better traits. He liked that just fine and said he hoped he would do just that.
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